Dark secrets

Dark secrets
Ashamed to be seen in daylight
So broken and empty
The night my special haunt
Walking always walking
Past homes of the rich
Motor homes, boats and fancy cars
Light spills lavishly out
As I peer in to see
How I will never live
Hungry cold and alone
Ashamed at my full pockets
Just apples nobody wanted
Laying there to waste
With miles of curb to walk
Balance rhythm and gait
I'm trying to regain
But bitter and dark
The shame remains

There's no shame Pariah. I'm so honored that you are opening up to us and sharing some of your life

Keep writing friend, keep talking to us, we care

a part of this poem reminds me briefly of one of my fav author robert frost. one poem he wrote ends in famous lines "i have miles to go before i sleep and miles to go..." or something like that. its been a very long time since i read it -- yet the general feel is the same- walking, thinking, haunted and so many feelings pass with each step. this poem is symbolic of your steps through life - actually a phase of the darker thoughts in your life. Yet encourage the moments of positive thinking in your life to bloom. The old adage the "grass is greener on the other side" often gets us nowhere but negative feelings. from what i understand of you so far it seems that you have much more treasures within you than you realize. BIG HUGS

this was written about the time in my life when we were truly poor and I would walk miles of curb to get strength and balance. I've never forgoten what it meant to be so hungry as to pick up fallen apples from rich people's yards so I'd have something to eat. It really is ancient stuff -- the feelings. I admit, sometimes the devil sucker-punches me with old crud... I TRY not to listen. But thanks, Kat for your wonderful words
john

John

wow, thanks for sharing

Powerful stuff; something I certainly can relate to, alone, walking and hungry...

Me too, I have been without food for days at a time before and not just hungry for food but hungry for some kind of recognition that I am a human.

deltaelise wrote:

but hungry for some kind of recognition that I am a human.

You are very much a human Delta and we all love you

Delta, WHAT would make you say such a thing? You are a beautiful person... a good friend. I have much more to say, but am getting cut off by this darned fickle connection!
love
john

Pariah wrote:

Delta, WHAT would make you say such a thing? You are a beautiful person... a good friend.

And I agree 100% Delta

Brianna wrote:

Pariah wrote:

Delta, WHAT would make you say such a thing? You are a beautiful person... a good friend.

And I agree 100% Delta

I also agree Delta; but I also understand exactly how you felt at that time, "hungry for some kind of recognition that I am human" Some of us have witnessed first hand man's inhumanity to man so to speak

You are all too kind

That's what makes Hugz so special to me Delta, we do care