Is it me?

Wow, this board has dropped to nearly dead since the "troll" incident. Have we all lost heart? Lost what this place was -- a place of daily sharing and warmth, of camaraderie and caring?
Did I mess things up with my constant whining? I mess everything up and am, after all PARIAH... so if it is me I will leave and let you all have what you had before. ( I say that half in jest... but... .)
I think we need to pick up and move on. I have been so low and sooooo needy and have tried, really tried NOT to post my stinkin' thinkin', but if we are all in a pit WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING! I've really been walloped and in terribl pain and if this is why we are all not posting much, well then we need to change what we are doing. I have lost a lot of friends in the past and don't want to ever have that happen again!
be well
john

I don't get here as much as I should I'll try and be here more.

Hi John,

I know I feel the same way when people don't show up on my board.
I'm sorry I haven't been around much but the old depression is really bad right now and I can't get too motivated about things.

I am sure things will pick up :)

Few people are on vacation this week too so that also makes it seem really slow!!

I'm still trying to get out of the hole. I use to be happy all the time. I woke up in a good mood. Something happen in May and I don't know what it was. I just can't get my life on track anymore. I'm going to the Dr. this Thursday. I hope I get some results. I hope they find something.

No no John it's not you. Please don't think that way. Brianna, Mike, Lost One and myself have been away. Please don't stay away

No John, it isn't you, it is the time of year when the board drops off due to vacations, summertime blues, etc, I have not done my part this week in posting the board news while Mike and Brianna have been vacationing, my bad and I apologize for that, I have been working 11 or more hours a day and was tired and forgot. I will get to it today. But never feel that you are to blame by your feelings that you are bringing the board down, you are not! You are a valued member that contributes much, and we value ALL members of our board! Don't you ever think that we don't want you to share your feelings or your writings with us again!

I really did not think I had anything to do with the board being slow, but y'know how the stinkin' thinkin' goes. I have been in the pit and really don't know how to climb out this time. I've got a dr apt in a few days, but the last thing I want is another pill.

Terry, don't beat yourself up -- you didn't do anything wrong. If anything, it is me not being as "connected" here as I could be -- cuz then I woulda known people were on vacation, etc. Yeah, I get busy this time of year too -- there are 26 jars of gooseberry jelly sitting on the table to prove it. Made a dozen or so jars of current jelly as well (and could pick and do that many more as well!!).
I'm having a hard time with finances and time slipping away -- so many dreams get further away! I have been so stuck. I wish I could go back to school -- there is a lot I COULD do. I wish I could buy a repo house or two to remodel, because that always makes me feel alive and useful. BUT I gotta focus on what I have and in reality -- I got more work than I can shake a shovel at as it is (just no operating budget to DO any of it!).
ah well
I'm thankful for all of you, dear friends!!!!
john

Oh John I definitely know the "stinkin thinkin" feeling. I'm so glad you're talking to us. I wish I had some words of wisdom but you know, sometimes we have to do what we have to do. Here's hoping you find that silver lining John

John, my friend, it's definitely not "you". I think we're all a little guilty here in not posting more. Mike said they were going to let the board run itself and I guess we haven't done a good job

Yes, indeed, I am as guilty as anyone, I have let Mike and Brianna down as well as all of you, I haven't done any articles, or helped one at the board, I guess the stinking feeling has hit us all

i could be here more. its a summer thing though, on kats board theres no activity either, but i could post more and i will

I can't even think what to say.

I don't get it

I'm going to the Dr. Thursday. I hope she has found something in the tests she ran. I don't want her to say it's all in my head. I can't lose any weight no matter what I do or not do. I can eat all week like a pig or walk a mile a day and eat hardly anything and still stay the same weight. I'm so down in the dumps I don't like to be around people because I don't want to talk. I just am so tired of feeling like I do

Shelly

Hang in there Shelly

I really am trying.. It seems like everytime I grab a rope it breaks

We'll keep the ends tied together

Thinking of you Shelly

Who's your favorite hunk Shelly? Maybe if we put him on the other end you'll grab it

Shelly, I know what you mean. Well, know this -- I'm in the pit with ya! And if it means anything, I'm praying for you!!!
john

John....

Shelly and John